


Until it felt wrong..

by WHATHEJAS



Category: Haikyuu!!, Ushijima Wakatoshi - Fandom, shiratorizawa - Fandom
Genre: F/M, Fem!Reader x Ushijima Wakatoshi, Haikyuu Scenario, Haikyuu!!! - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:20:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26341030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WHATHEJAS/pseuds/WHATHEJAS
Summary: The constant battle of looking in his eyes not feeling the same as you did before, it will hurt. But spmeone has to let go... for the both you.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	Until it felt wrong..

_"I'm home.."_ Ushijima said as he entered his shared apartment with you.

He looked around and saw that you weren't in the living room.

He removed his shoes and placed it on the shoe rack.

He walked to your shared bedroom, and there he saw you, immersed on your newly bought horror novel, he stared at you as your eyes scan the book, completely unaware of the fact that your loving boyfriend has arrived. Ushijima leaned by the door frame and knocked at the opened door.

You looked and smiled.. "Welcome home.." you said as you stand to give him a kiss on the cheek and a hug. Ushijima chuckled when he felt you tiptoed just to reach his cheeks.

"Have you eaten dinner yet?" you asked as you held his hand and lightly pulled his arm to bring him to the kitchen.

"Not yet, what do you have for me?" Ushijima said as you opened the stove to re heat the food you cooked for him.

Ushijima sat at the chair in front of you.

He placed his hands on his pocket and felt the velvet box inside as he smiled and admired your back view. 

He is finally ready to spend the rest of his life with you.

\----------

"Let me do the dishes.." Ushijima said as he picked up the plate and placed it on the sink.

"Okay, i'll be in our room" you said as head back to your room. You sighed as you entered the room you went directly to your balcony, feeling the cold wind brush against your skin as you stare at the Tokyo city lights.

You didn't know how it happened.

But it faded, your love for Ushijima slowly faded.

His I love you's never felt the same, his hugs weren't as warm as it is before.

Maybe its just a phase, you tried to convince yourself at first.

But during the time when both of you would talk about the future and how obvious it was that he'd spend the rest of his life with you.

Your future is not the same as him, you stopped imagining a future with him and you don't know why.

Because he was enough, he loved you, he tried his best and he never failed to tell and show you how much he loves you.

You plan to break it up to him.

You need to.

But you were so scared that you'd hurt him, because Ushijima doesn't deserve it.

You looked down as you wiped your tears remembering his promise that he'll never leave you alone, and how you smiled and believed his words.

But here you are, the one who broke it.

____________

Ushijima looked at the figure in front of him, he can see how your shoulders were shaking and he confirmed that your were crying when he saw you wiped your face. 

He felt it. 

He noticed it when your "We" became "I". And that was when he realized that you were slowly building your future, but he wasn't a part of it. 

That is why he exerted more effort in making you feel loved. Because he thought that at some point you will fall again. That it will become "we" again. 

But maybe, he was just fooling himself. Because if you did. This wouldn't be happening. 

But Ushijima will risk it all for you, and for him. He was hopeful when it comes to you. He was selfish. Those where his thoughts when he bought that ring. He was thinking of cornering you, asking you those words to keep you tied to him. But it was all wrong. It was wrong to keep you to himself. 

And if he won't break it to you, who know where it will lead. 

Ushijima walked up to you. 

"When did it happen?" Ushijima asked. 

You didn't answer pretending that you didn't hear anything.

"Do you love me?" he asked. 

You immediately nodded. 

You were shocked when you heard him chuckle. 

"No, wrong question. _Are you still inlove with me?"_

You were having _the conversation_ you were avoiding for the past weeks. 

"I....don't..know.." you silently said as tears run down your eyes. 

Ushijima closed his eyes. 

He felt his heart shattered. So it was true and it was this painful. 

You cried more when you saw tears flowing out of his eyes. 

_This wasn't supposed to happen._

_Where did it go wrong?_

_Why do I have to deal with this?_

_We were okay, it was going well._

_This pain they both feel are two different kinds of pain._

"Do you still see you future with me?" Ushijima asked.

_Don't answer._

"Do you still want to do this?" he asked again.

_It's now or never, you thought to yourself._

No words came out of your mouth so you just shrugged. 

You were lost, really really lost. 

"You know one of us has to let go right? its now or never" Ushijima said.

You wanted to get out of this conversation, you don't want it. 

Can't I just feel it again? 

I loved him before, I can love him again. Right?

Right? 

You knew it was a lie. Because you tried too.

"I'm sorry, but i tried to... to fall again." you tried to explain even though it hurts to speak because you know you were stabbing knives through his chest. 

Ushijima can just nod. It hurts so much like there are knives stabbing his chest. 

But the both of you reached this point so as much as it hurt someone has to call the shot, and Ushijima will be the one to do it. 

_"Let's end it.."_ he said.

And you could only just nod and cry. 

He kissed your forehead and whispered that its okay.

\-----------

Ushijima can just stare at the woman walking away from him.

Its been a week after the break up. 

"Goodbye, Ushijima." she said. 

He watched as she faded away. 

Ushijima held tightly at the velvet box.

_"Maybe_ I was the only one ready.." he thought to himself. 


End file.
